Carolyn Munro is stunning.
David Hasselhoff actually acts.
Marjoe Gortner is…
Did I mention Carolyn Munro is stunning?
Oh, and this totally not-ripped-off-from-Star Wars classic was shot on a $10 with a script probably stolen from my basement in the original crayon. Hey, I was ambitious when I was 5.
Ladies and gentlemen, enter the nightmare world that is…