Screw Black Friday!

Zombies attack WalmartI’ve had an up-and-down relationship with the holidays. Christmas was always bad depending on what my life situation was, or it was something to look forward to. Thanksgiving is always good. I’m usually with people I love, and let’s be honest, I like to eat. Just ask my doctor. And I’ve never been down on New Year’s Eve, even at my worst. It’s a reboot. It wipes the slate clean. But one part of the holiday season will forever grate my nerves: Black Friday.

There’s a meme making rounds on Facebook now. It says “Only in America will we have a feast to give thanks for what we have only to kill each other the next day over stuff we don’t have.” Something to that effect. Black Friday is ridiculous. And it’s getting worse. Target opens on Thanksgiving now, as does Walmart. In fact, I think this is just an egregious corruption of the holiday. Going to the movies? Most people do it in the evening on Thanksgiving. Restaurants? I’m ambivalent about that. I went to Thanksgiving dinner with my brother at a local restaurant where he lives. But at the same time, someone has to miss the holiday to feed me that day. On the other hand, there’s something about working with food on Thanksgiving that some restaurant workers enjoy. So I’m not as bothered by that.

But this capitalistic orgy at Target and Walmart and a few other stores? It bugs the hell out of me. People camp out to buy a $20 DVD player? Trampling incidents? Crowds that make the Superbowl look like a candidate for local blackout. All this just makes me want to sleep in. Last year, I worked in e-commerce, so I went to work normally that day. Most years, I’ve had it off. So I really do sleep in.

So while some of you are engaging in full-contact, steel cage match shopping, I will be snoring away.

But here’s a little music for you while your looking over the door dings in your car from all those shopping carts slamming into it.

Leave a Reply